Assimilation and Over-Assimilation
Most expats who move to China follow a similar pattern. First, there's the shock and euphoria of actually living in China. Then, there's a protracted struggle to carve out a life despite linguistic and cultural misunderstandings. Finally, one finds his stasis in China; though while there still may be issues with understanding and occasional frustrations, for the most part the laowai has found his niche in China.
This stasis can be called assimilation, a word with a distinctly positive connotation in expat circles. But can it go too far? Can one over-assimilate? What would over-assimilation even look like? I hazard a guess:
Assimilation: You no longer mind squat toilets and even find them preferable in public latrines.
Over-assimilation: You break your friend's toilet seat by attempting to stand on it and squat.
Assimilation: You develop a fine taste for Chinese vegetables, even ones prepared with a gallon of oil.
Over-assimilation: You demand to the waiter at the "Western restaurant" that he boil the elements in your green salad.
Assimilation: You're more than happy to drink beer with your Chinese friends in the "ganbei" style, at least on occasion
Over-assimilation: You refuse to drink beer in anything larger than a shot glass.
Assimilation: You don't mind sitting with your Chinese girlfriend under an umbrella in the shade when you take her to the beach
Over-assimilation: You tell your friends just coming back from vacation in Thailand that they have turned "too black".
Any others?
April 14th, 2009 - 16:12
Assimilation: You don’t really mind all that much when an intoxicated pseudo-stranger puts his arm around you at a bar and yells in your ear: “æˆ‘è·Ÿä½ è®²”.
Over-assimilation: You start doing it too.
April 14th, 2009 - 19:02
Sorry, but I could never see “assimilation” as a positive word, to me it has too many associations with “becoming just like us” with definite overtones of “becoming civilised, just like us superior beings”. “Adaptation”, “acclimatisation” or “integration” I can deal with, words which to me imply retaining one’s original cultural identity while learning to navigate the new culture, and therefore suggests a mutual respect for cultural difference.
Having said that, reading your list I think I must be way, way beyond over-assimilation.
I do, however, demand a revision of your beer example for over-assimilation: You refuse to drink your beer at anything less than room temperature- indeed, you don’t even drink beer in winter [not that you Kunmingites would know what "winter" means], drinking only baijiu so long as the temperature is lower than 20 celsius- and when you do drink beer [but only in summer, naturally] it is always in standard 250 ml glasses and ganbei’ed.
umm… so I guess I’m not over-assimilated, then.
April 15th, 2009 - 09:57
Assimilation: You find the special smell of breadsticks/pizza and salsa enjoyable instead of the wrong impression: who took off the shoes?
Over Assimilation: You don’t have Zidi potato chips without salsa.
April 15th, 2009 - 12:59
Assimilation: You learn to appreciate the historical significance of all the statues you see in many of China’s cities, regardless of whether you like them or not.
Over-assimilation: You build your own 15-foot statue of Obama and put it on your front lawn.
April 15th, 2009 - 16:00
Good ones so far. Chris, do people really not drink beer in the winter up north? Wow. I thought with the central heating you enjoy over yonder beer might not be such a bad option.
Sigh. Northern China is like Southern California: a riddle wrapped in a mystery wrapped in an enigma. Or did I get the order wrong?
April 15th, 2009 - 16:08
Matt, beer is cooling, baijiu is heating. When you’re sitting in a farmhouse in the mountains of northern China in mid-winter, it’s not anything cooling you want to be drinking.
April 15th, 2009 - 16:11
and besides, I distinctly remember one mid-winter day getting you fuelled up on baijiu before taking you out into the norwesterly gale.
April 15th, 2009 - 18:40
Assimilation: Agreeing that getting Western pizzas are expensive
Overassimilation: Refusing to eat anything that costs more than 10 kuai because it’s considered too expensive
Assimilation: You know how to get around the Net Nanny
Overassimilation: a. You start to agree that the government has to protect you from the outside world or b. You go back home and still find yourself using proxies to get to your own blog.
April 19th, 2009 - 22:40
Assimilation: After months of practice you can finally squat and take a dump without regularly toppling backwards into a squat toilet. Doggnammit, you’ve even learned how to wipe whilst still in the squat position.
Over Assimilation: You find it strangely satisfying in developing the unique multi-tasking skill of shitting, chain-smoking and shouting into your mobile phone in public lavatories. In fact, you decide that this is how all your business negotiations should be carried out.
Assimilation: You finally get over the language barrier/cultural differences/insanity and decide to accept Chinese girls for who they are. “it’s my problem”, you kid yourself, “I just need to understand her culture more”
Over Assimilation: You have been brow beaten into the role of human bag stand. You dutifully follow your master from shop to shop, laden with her newly acquired goods (that you bought from the whopping three thousand Yuan per month you make for 8 hours/week English shouting) while she complains incessantly that you don’t spend enough on her, stopping on occasion to loudly chastise you in front of all and sundry. The fact that a bird like this wouldn’t even give you the steam off her shit back home kind of makes up for it though, doesn’t it?
Assimilation: “I want the real China experience. I will only eat Chinese food, will have a Chinese girlfriend and I will only hang out with Chinese people (even boring ones), for this is my China. I will get up at the arse -crack of dawn everyday to partake in the ancient art of Tai Ji Quan with a bunch of sword wielding octogenarians in Green Lake Park, for this is China. I will suck the gristle off pigs feet and I will enjoy it. I will dress as the people of China dress, cutting a dashing figure in my full Mao costume and 10 yuan army shoes, for I AM China.
Over Assimilation: “Who the FUCK is that foreigner in my China!!! This is MY China! How dare you be here spoiling my REAL experience. I’ve been here longer and my Chinese is better than yours! ‘What, no I will not help you for you have only been here for 6 months and I have been here for nearly a year!” “Cao Ni de, I am the only foreigner here!”